I'm currently reading The Undead series by RR Haywood and I'm absolutely
hooked. If you like zombie films, zombie books or anything involving
the end of the world and people making terrible decisions, you need to
give these books a go.
The story follows a Tesco supermarket
manager, Howie, whose quiet life is interrupted by a full-blown zombie
apocalypse. As it does.
Reading the books got me thinking about
what I'd do if the undead ever turned up on my street. More importantly,
it got me thinking about how Sikhs would cope.
After careful
consideration, several cups of cha and absolutely no scientific research
whatsoever, I've come to the conclusion that Sikhs would do just fine.
Here are five reasons why.
1. Armed and Dangerous
Let's start with the obvious one.
Baptised Sikhs carry a Kirpan, a small ceremonial sword or dagger, as part of their faith. While everyone else is searching garden sheds for something useful, many Sikhs have already ticked "sharp object" off their apocalypse shopping list.
The zombies won't know what's hit them.
2. Enough Food to Feed a Small Nation
Every Sikh household seems to have a mysterious ability to generate atta (Chapatti flour) from thin air.
You open a cupboard looking for one bag of flour and somehow discover enough to supply a medium-sized bakery for the next six months.
Chapatti would quickly become the official food of the apocalypse.
The zombies can have brains but we'll have fresh chapattis.
3. The Secret Garage Survival Kit
"But how will you cook?" I hear you ask.
Simple.
Walk into the garage of any self-respecting Punjabi family and you'll probably find a Calor gas bottle, a spare cooker, three extension leads, two fans that haven't worked since 1998 and enough miscellaneous equipment to survive until civilisation restarts.
I'm convinced some garages already look like post-apocalyptic supply depots.
4. Seva Would Keep Everything Running
One of the core strengths of Sikh communities is Seva, or selfless service.
Need food cooked? Somebody will help.
Need cleaning done? Somebody will help.
Need supplies organised? Somebody will help.
Need someone to make tea? Half the community is already brewing up.
When survival depends on people working together, Seva becomes a superpower.
5. Gurdwaras Would Become Safe Zones
If there's one thing history has shown, it's that Sikh communities rally together when needed.
Gurdwaras would naturally become community hubs and safe places where people could gather, organise and support each other.
More importantly, nobody leaves a gurdwara hungry (food for the mind and soul).
In a zombie apocalypse, that's a pretty useful feature.
Final Thoughts
Of course, if a real zombie apocalypse ever happens, this article will either make me look like a genius or become evidence that I had far too much free time.
But if the undead do arrive, I'll be heading towards the nearest Gurdwara.
Worst case scenario, I'll get eaten.
Best case scenario, I'll get a hot roti and a cup of tea first.
You can download RR Haywood's The Undead Day One from Amazon (link)
